Thank You...

I'd finally worn out my jazz shoes... goodbye, my precious... thanks for serving me so well for the past decade.

寂寞的人生路

人生，其实像一条从宽阔的平原走进森林的路。在平原上同伴可以结伙而行，欢乐地前推后挤、相濡以沫；一旦进入森林，草丛和荆棘挡路，各人专心走各人的路，寻找各人的方向，那推推挤挤的群体情感，那无忧无虑无猜忌的同侪深情，在人的一生中也只有少年期有。离开这段纯洁而明亮的阶段，路其实可能愈走愈孤独。你将被家庭羁绊，被责任捆绑，被自己的野心套牢，被人生的复杂和矛盾压抑，你往丛林深处走去，愈走愈深，不复再有阳光似的伙伴。到了熟透的年龄，即使在群众的怀抱中，你都可能觉得寂寞无比.

《亲爱的安德烈》
龙应台，作家

My Week

there are days where I would rather write. I love writing. Possibly because I am not good at expressing myself by nature. I was once good in math and science too you know and always would like to think that I am slightly above average.

I had a tremendously busy week. I had to juggle some strange admin/ technical people and co-workers at work and get a presentation together. In addition to that my global CEO was in town and I had all these media dramas to take care of. It's a wierd week. A week where I wouldn't mind getting perpetually sloshed just so that I can get a good night's rest without waking up in the wee hours of the night in panic.

The week ended well, with little drama and most went home happy. Thanks to my boss, who did his magic tricks with my slides, I wasn't the cause of anyone's snoring in the middle the conference presentation.

I ended off with this, which sort of sums up and justifies my being... I'm loving it so much that I thought I should share this here.

Niarb Aep

Which is worse?
1) A small minded man
2) A man with half a brain

A Thousand Miles

Tonight's one of those night where I just could not get to sleep. I might be mulling through the presentation which I need to submit by tomorrow.

I was so stressed that I went for a walkabout today and found this card with the inscriptions that was my late mother's mantra to me when I was younger...

"A journey of a thousand miles begin with a single step"

Run Forrest! Run!

I signed up for my first Shape Run today!

Following The Wrong God Home

I'd recently unearthed an old blog entry from three years back. That was a defining year of my life, a year when I realised that dreams really don't come true...

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Followed the Wrong God Home?
December 20, 2006

I’d always loved to read… and today, sick in bed, I started to read Catherine Lim’s new novel, "Following the Wrong God Home".

Late last year, I bumped into her, Catherine Lim, at Orchard Cineleisure as we were waiting to see the same movie - Perhaps Love. Unabashed, I walked up to say hi, introduced myself and told her how much I’d loved her works - from the Song of Silver Frond to the Bondmaid, Her imagination, vivid descriptions and how intricately she’d weave the lives of her characters together in every story - though the concept of how a man and a woman can fall in love in three meetings is beyond me.

Following the Wrong God Home struck a chord in me and if you are a woman, around my age, at the crossroads of your life, it would reach out to you as well. Yin Ling, a young graduate was torn between marrying Vincent Chee, a rising political star and an idealistic American lecturer, Ben. She’s torn between love and debt as coming from a poor family, Vincent had provided for her and for her family, making their lives in a small flat as confortable as possible with gifts of air-conditioning, standing fan, etc etc. He’d even paid for her old servant’s hefty medical bills. While Ben, the American lecturer, vocal and a rebel was on the verge of being sacked by the University.

Any girl in the right frame of mind would agree that Vincent is the right choice. Which girl would be mad enough to say no to a life where everything is provided for, where she can then focus on bringing up a family and live a life where she doesn’t have to worry about the rising cost of living?

But of course, following one’s heart and listening to one’s mind is very different. For by following the heart, it allows one to feel every beat, every soar and dip in emotions, one can even hear the heart sing sometimes. Listening to logic is perhaps, like listening to rhetoric - doing what’s deemed correct but perhaps not what makes the heart happy.

Which is right? Which is wrong? I have no idea. For most days, I bury myself in a flurry of work and social activities, just so that I do not think and perhaps try my best not to feel. But it is not easy, when you are stuck in bed, like me today, with a book and a night full of dreams and imageries from the past and wondering where everyone’s gone, how everything’s changed and realising that time has passed, so quickly, without me knowing…

In retrospect, I think I have always followed my heart but perhaps at life’s crossroads, I should perhaps follow my logic - but in the story’s context, am I following the right God?

"The four chambers of the heart were meant to serve the different needs: two to beat to necessity’s tempo, two to love’s"

- Following the Wrong God Home, C. Lim

My Mother, She lives through us...

My sister's wise words to me on our mother's death:-

when mummy passed away, ah yi said, "When you're embarking on a journey of life, you can't be carrying all the baggage of burdens all the time. When it's time to let go, let go."

Inspiration In Transit

I love taking buses. To me bus rides are a treat - for they give me the opportunity to zone out, reflect, read, check and reply my messages. I saw this when I was on the bus today, on one of those TV mobile platforms (or whatever you call them). I reminded myself to count my blessings and decided to park this here.

***
BE THANKFUL

Be thankful that you don't already have everything you desire.
If you did, what would there be to look forward to?
Be thankful when you don't know something,
for it gives you the opportunity to learn.

Be thankful for the difficult times.
During those times you grow.
Be thankful for your limitations,
because they give you opportunities for improvement.
Be thankful for each new challenge,
because it will build your strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes. They will teach you valuable lessons.
Be thankful when you're tired and weary,
because it means you've made a difference.

It's easy to be thankful for the good things.
A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who
are also thankful for the setbacks.
Gratitude can turn a negative into a positive.
Find a way to be thankful for your troubles,
and they can become your blessings.

Colour Me Rainbow!

I am addicted to shopping. No, this has nothing to do with the influence of Confessions of a Shopaholic nor the rest of Sophie Kinsella's Shopaholic series.

It's gotta do with the fact that me - the laggard - has finally succumbed to consumerism.

The thrill of finding a great bargain:
1) floral tube dress for S$20
2) kimono dress for S$15
3) whimsical necklaces at S$10 a piece
4) retro looking belts for S$5 each

I added five new dresses, three new belts, a pair of new earrings and some other knick knacks for less than S$200 in the past two weeks.

Pictures up later.